A topic worth investigating, but one that will be misinterpreted if you are not in a Biblically sound Body of Christ. Christianity is corporate, and as His people we are meant to live under His Word together. Older in faith teaching younger in faith (not merely older in age, but older in the faith); all under the authority of elders. You were called into His Body, not onto your own island.
Biblical Womanhood does not mean…
When I was a freshman in college, a professor told me to change my major from Biblical Studies to Elementary Education, because as a woman that is where I belonged. I spent a lot of money, time and heartache taking a semester’s load of worthless courses. I cried so often as I contemplated a major I loathed to continue. Thankfully, no other professor discouraged me from switching back. I very happily graduated with my Bachelors in Biblical Studies.
I know what it feels like to know that I have the gift of teaching, and to be told that as a woman I cannot be taught, and cannot use my gift. I know what it is to rebel against that notion with a pendulum swing that feels good, and to assert that I can use my gift in the same ways as men (which, by the way, I no longer assert; I will not covet men’s roles, or envy them their roles).
I was then mentored by a favorite professor and pastor, taught to rightly handle the Word, and encouraged as I discipled younger students. As I wondered what to do after graduation, I wanted a Masters, but had no real direction. I took a course with Dr. Habermas, and he wrote on one of my term papers that I should do the Masters of Arts in Religious Studies, because the world needed more scholars like me. WHAT?! I very happily pursued that degree, concentrating in Philosophical Theology. Of course I assumed I would continue my studies somewhere in Europe, and eventually teach college level courses–but I happily traded that dream in, to marry my best friend, work in Student Affairs, and eventually become a mom.
That first professor was mistaken with his 1950’s cultural norms. Many in my own generation are mistaken because they overreact to such cultural norms–the pendulum swings too far in another direction.
Not all that is handed down is good–yet, not all that is handed down is bad. I want to encourage you to sift through the ideas, pray in the Spirit for His understanding and enlightenment, and find some Titus 2 older women you can trust. But also–don’t overreact against men who have written on the topic, read those ideas prayerfully too.
Biblical Womanhood is not a shunning of men, or a covetting of manhood, or envying masculinity, or denying the beauty and goodness of being a woman in God’s image. Do not commit logical fallacies while attempting to discern what is true. If you are not keen on what logical fallacies are–let me warn you, you will be easily deceived by those who employ them in their egalitarian narratives and reels and rants.
Redeem Some Time
I also know the joy of fellowshipping with my brothers and sisters in Christ, as a sister-in-Christ, as a woman. My gifts have been affirmed by the elders in my church, they encourage me. It is not true that all complementarians overlook women, neglect women, or ostracize women. It has been my non-reformed brothers who fear to read my books, or to converse with me about theological topics, or even to encourage their own wives to “choose the good portion.” My own pastor continually recommends books, discusses what I’m studying in Scripture, and encourages me to learn and use my gifts.
Like anything else worthwhile in life, both logic and womanhood cannot be learned from a quick tutorial, from snippets and sound bytes, or from a two minute blog post. As the New Year approaches, and you set some goals or create a reading list (I hope you create a reading list?), consider spending a few months in both topics!
I love talking about this topic in person, it is so much easier to converse over this than to write about–primarily because I do not know you, dear reader, and what your angst may be, and where on the pendulum you have swung… I have a few posts from over the years which I know have encouraged some sisters-in-Christ; I link them all here for convenience. I am also recommending some books, as this topic is worth your time and effort. Enjoy!
abidedeep.com/a-prayer-to-our-only-help/
abidedeep.com/created-in-his-image-male-and-female/
abidedeep.com/the-chief-end-of-womanhood/
abidedeep.com/teaching-sound-doctrine/
abidedeep.com/she-chose-the-good-portion/
abidedeep.com/handing-down-the-disciplines-of-the-faith/
abidedeep.com/anna-the-prophetess/
abidedeep.com/contemplative-prayer-for-helpers/
abidedeep.com/author-spotlight-natalie-brand/
If you are to going rightly handle the Word of God, then consider this a topic to be studied as you study the Word; not in one sitting but over many years. Study each passage in context, as part of the whole rather than separated and isolated from Scripture. The picture above shows books that are helpful, I’ve also enjoyed listening to a few new ones on Hoopla: Five Lies of Our Anti-Christian Age by Rosaria Butterfield; Toxic Masculinity by Nancy Pearcy (yes, sadly, unbiblical understanding of womanhood leads us to embrace toxic views, to covet manhood, to despise men; this book can help you avoid that!).
I would also highly recommend this article, https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/themelios/article/the-making-of-biblical-womanhood-a-review/, before you decide to dig into the egalitarian view. Rather than wrangle about words, (remember 2 Timothy 2?) consider the complementarian equality we are meant to enjoy, rather than believing complementarians are by definition Patriarchal subordinationists.
Reformed theologians do not espouse a gender hierarchy, but rather see the goodness of God displayed in both sexes distinctly and beautifully, both in His image both to His glory, yet not confusing the two or erasing differences. Headship and submission are related to roles, not to worth or value or essence or ability. Strive to enjoy the harmony He creates.
Incline your heart toward Him, lean into Him, listen to Him, learn from Him, abide in Him:
Incline my heart to Your testimonies
And not to dishonest gain.
Turn away my eyes from looking at vanity,
And revive me in Your ways.
Establish Your word to Your servant,
As that which produces reverence for You.
Turn away my reproach which I dread,
For Your ordinances are good.
Behold, I long for Your precepts;
Revive me through Your righteousness.
Psalm 119:36-40